Thirty.

How Far Along: 30 weeks.  I cannot believe we have reached week numbers that start with "3".

Total Weight Gain: 2.5 pounds this past week - AGAIN.  My body really hates me.  I even felt like I ate less this week because every time I eat I get so full that I can barely move.  It's like I eat an apple slice and I can hardly breath because I'm so full.  Sam is taking up way too much room in my belly for me to put a whole lot of food in there.  Ughhh...29 pounds total.  I now have cellulite on the front of my legs.  Vom.  If nothing else, I guess I will be more than motivated to train for a half marathon next year!

Maternity Clothes: I should look back on my blog and see how many weeks ago it was that I had to buy new, bigger pants, because I'm there again.  Maybe this time I will just buy 2 sizes bigger so I don't run the risk of my ass and thunder thighs outgrowing that size too in the next 2 months. 

Sleep: At this point I'm really wishing we would have bought the mattress 3 months ago.  I think I've reached the point where it doesn't matter what I'm laying on, I just don't sleep for more than an hour at a time.  Saturday morning I woke up at 5:45 to pee because Sam was kicking my bladder and I couldn't fall back asleep because my back hurt so bad.  I laid in bed and cried for about 15 minutes thinking "how am I going to do this for 10 more weeks?  It's Saturday morning and I'm awake before 6am for no reason."  I didn't want to wake Jake up so I went down to the couch and cried some more and tried to fall back to sleep for about an hour until I just gave up.  Silver lining - at least it wasn't 3am.  I woke up and cleaned a little bit until Jake woke up around 7:45 and we started our day.  I guess I can kiss sleep good bye for the next year or so.  I will be a functioning zombie until this time next year when (hopefully) Little Miss is sleeping most of the way through the night and I don't have a large belly causing enough back pain to make a Marine cry.

Sam's Things:  No showers or gifts this week, and I haven't been shopping, so here's a picture of Callie trying to look so fetch in my fake Burberry scarf.  Happy Monday!

Best Moment this Week: Most definitely my parents' Halloween party was the best moment this week.  There is nothing I love more than seeing 20-somethings all the way through 60-somethings dressed up in ridiculous costumes and doing shots off of my parents' island in their kitchen.  Although I had to refrain from any adult beverages this year, I was highly entertained for a good 6 hours.  I can't lie, I'm already looking forward to next year.  Here we are as a disco dancer and a disco ball (I'm loving the sideburns):

Shout out to my Jessica H's: what it do baby, it's the ice man Paul Wall, got my BUMP lookin somethin like a disco ball.

A close second best moment this week would have to be our tour of Christ Hospital on Saturday morning.  The RN that did the tour was really great, the birthing center is really nice, and just being there and hearing her go over everything really calmed some nerves.  Not to mention the fact that just being in the hospital and thinking about the fact that the next time I'll be in one of those rooms we'll be meeting our babe for the first time made us both a little emotional.  I definitely needed that after the emotional breakdown I experienced earlier that morning.

Movement: Everything I read says that I should be tracking her movements and that there should be "active periods" throughout the day, but tracking movement just sounds like way too much effort.  Until my doctor tells me to track them, I'm just going to go about my business letting her kick me in the ribs and bladder for the next 2 months.  I have to admit it's really weird when we push on the upper part of my belly and can feel a child, and then down low by my bladder I can feel pressure inside of my body, like it's obvious we are pushing her down. 

Food Cravings: Like I said before, I've kind of reached the point where I really can't eat too much in one sitting because Sam is taking up too much room in my abdomen for me to really fill up my stomach a whole lot.  It's Halloween this week, I imagine I'll probably eat a few hundred Twix and Reese Cups before the week is over.  See previous rant about fat ass and thighs for clarification of this disaster that is my diet.

Symptoms: Word for word from my BabyBump app: For many women, as your due date approaches, it's a common and very normal time to feel more emotional than usual.  You'll experience more frequent mood swings, and very likely some anxiety over the coming baby and the new responsibilities that lie ahead.  Your body is working hard to carry oxygen and nutrients to your baby and your diaphragm will be pushed up by your still expanding uterus, causing you to feel short of breath.  That pretty much sums up my last week: Can't breathe. Want to cry all the time.  Moving on.

What I Miss: Sitting in the same position for more than 20 minutes without feeling uncomfortable. 

What I am Looking Forward to: My momma and sister are throwing a shower for me and Sam this weekend, so I'm really looking forward to seeing a bunch of family members and close friends.  Besides, who doesn't love cake and shower food?

Exercise: I did okay last week.  I walked on Monday, Wednesday, and Thursday.  Tuesday I did Pure Barre with my sister.  I would just like to note that I am not a walker.  My legs get all itchy and tingly and my hands swell like the Pillsbury dough boy.  People say all the time how much they hate running, well I hate walking for exercise as much as those people hate running.  I'll continue to do it until I get unpregnant so I don't gain 5 pounds a week instead of a whopping 2.5, but know that I am doing it begrudgingly and that I miss running SO MUCH.  The only thing that makes it tolerable is that I'm usually walking with a good friend or family member, so the company is always enjoyable.

Noteworthy Items:

-I have reached the point where I am completely OVER being pregnant (as if I wasn't over it the first week I found out I was knocked up).  However, I am in this limbo state where I'm done being pregnant and I want this baby out of me, but I do not feel prepared to be responsible for another human being.  I repeat: I DO NOT FEEL PREPARED TO BE RESPONSIBLE FOR ANOTHER HUMAN BEING.  Yikes.

-On that note, I hate being pregnant so much that I am already concerned about how the hell on God's green earth am I ever going to do this again.  Can I get a surrogate?  I guess I'll just have to cross that bridge when I get there.

-My legs are so fat and I am so uncomfortable, that I can no longer cross my legs.  I have been crossing my legs as long as I can remember (I have the spider veins to prove it - if you buy into that sort of thing).  So every time I sit I try to cross my legs but then realize that I am far too swollen (if that's what you want to call it) to do that.  It sucks and adds to the discomfort factor by a whole buttload.

-While I am not excited about the "Frankenstorm" that is currently pounding into the northeastern part of the U.S., I am so glad it's not 80 degrees anymore.  My growing self does not enjoy wearing short sleeves and baring my cottage cheese, ahem, I mean legs.  Now if we could just do mid 50s to mid 60s instead of 45, I would be happy.  Mother Nature is a sad, sorry, whorebag.

-The mother of one of my dear friends is in the hospital because of some crazy reaction to her flu shot and they are having trouble figuring out what's going on, so any extra prayers that can be offered up for her and her family would be much appreciated.  Love you JH!